Please forgive me if you find this question to be rather… peculiar. But hey, that’s what tough questions are all about.
A close friend of mine recently asked me: “Would you rather know that your wife was unfaithful to you and deal with the consequences, or would you prefer never to hear a word about it and just keep living in a world completely separated from reality?” And FYI, for this question I could assume that my wife would remain a good mother to my kids and make me happy in all the ways I desired.
What would you do?
Like many of us “proud boys,” I seriously struggled with this. Of course, as someone who always tries to read people’s motives, thoughts, and feelings, the thought of being deceived for a lifetime by the one person I should know the best frightened me. I know many men and women can relate to that very fear, and ironically (perhaps hypocritically), if I wasn’t imagining this scenario for personally, then I would likely find it rather silly that one’s ego should find its way into decision-making.
But after thinking about it further, I realized that the options I am dealt with can be reduced to two very simple paths:
- Blissful ignorance
- Depressing awareness
You can even remove the second word in both of those to simplify things even further. It is a choice about happiness and sadness. How can anyone hesitate when picking between those two?
Well, human nature is a funny thing. Egos are a funny thing. My friend insisted that he would subscribe to the “ignorance is bliss” mindset, not even thinking twice about it Annoyingly, that made me feel even more egotistical as I still don’t know how to answer that question.
If our perception equals our reality, why would one want to change their perception to result in a worse reality?
I love questions like these because when we struggle to find the answer, thereby causing us to question the fibre of our being, that is when we briefly break ourselves down a little in order to build ourselves back up as a more self-aware person. That is something we should all strive for even if it makes us uncomfortable in the moment, right?
So what would you pick?